From Transformers: Lost and Found
|Location||Lost Light: Command -- Drift's Office|
|Summary||Drift and Rodimus talk about what a jerk Soundwave is.|
As soon as he got the okay to leave the meeting, Drift stormed out of the incident room and straight into his office where he's been since. A quick peek through the bead curtain that is his door now shows that he isn't currently busy with anything except maybe stewing in his own frustration. He's sitting at his desk, staring at the photograph he usually keeps on it. By some miracle it managed to survive the worm attack.
Last out of the incident room, even Ultra Magnus leaving ahead of him, Rodimus makes his way out just a short time later to head straight for Drift's office. He brushes past the bead curtain with such casual ease that it'd be easy to forget the way they tangled around his limbs and slipped between the seams of his armor the first time he passed through. What a disaster.
NOT TODAY, though. Today he assumes invitation, enters, and crosses to Drift at the desk: "Hey."
Drift doesn't acknowledge Rodimus right away, his attention lingering on the photo in front of him. "Hey," he says finally, putting it down and turning his gaze towards Rodimus. "I'm sorry about.. you know.." Losing his cool? Being a huge dick for seemingly no reason? All of the above? "Back there. It wasn't very professional of me."
Reaching for the picture, Rodimus lifts it, looks at it, and then sets it up on the desk, facing Drift. "Yeah, you were a little out of line, but Soundwave was way past the line and somewhere on the next planet. How're you doing?" He reaches for Drift, palms turned up.
Drift accepts Rodimus' unspoken invitation, touching their hands together and holding them tight. "I'm a bit better now that you're here, but.." He glances at the photo and frowns, thinking back to what Soundwave said to him before storming out. "You know Soundwave is going to find him, right?"
Rodimus's fingers tighten in their grip. "I've been trying not to think about it. He hasn't yet."
"But he will!" Drift exclaims, grip tightening. He realizes how hard he is squeezing Rodimus' poor hands and loosens his hold. "There's never been a doubt in my mind that Megatron is still alive, still out there.. I was just hoping that everything that's been going on would be enough of a distraction. I don't want to see him, Rodimus. I'm.." His hands tighten again. "I'm scared."
Eyes widening, Rodimus shifts his gaze from his grip on Drift's hand to his face. He wiggles one hand free, but only so that he can set his hand to Drift's jaw, turning his head, and then brace his hand on his shoulder. He squeezes Drift's fingers with his other hand. "What scares you?" he asks, which is plainly the second thing he was going to say and not the first.
With one hand suddenly free, Drift seems confused as to what to do with it before putting it on Rodimus' hip. There we go. "Everything," he says with a weak laugh. "But mostly it's just seeing him again that terrifies me. Just seeing that piece of armour brought everything back, reminded me of everything I had done in his name. What I had done for him."
Rodimus leans forward, pressing his helm against Drift's in a brief and gentle touch. "You're not that person anymore, Drift. You're not. Rossum's trinity, right? And you're the transformation cog, and you transformed. You changed. You're different."
"I know, and that's another thing that terrifies me," Drift admits, leaning forward for mor crest bonking. "I was one of his favourites, everything a good Decepticon should strive to be. He liked me best when I was at my worst, and now that I've changed.. What will happen? I don't think I'm ready to fight him, I don't think I want to." He shakes his head. "And what about the crew? How much will we suffer when half of them leave to follow Megatron and Soundwave?"
Rodimus obliges, pressing back against Drift's helm, crest to crest, with firm and steady pressure. His fingers curl, lacing through Drift's. "You don't have to fight him. You don't even have to say anything to him." The question about the crew hits him where he's weak, though, and he can't answer. His spoiler twitches, winging back and down in a sad, drooping pull.
Now it's Drift's turn to offer Rodimus some comforting touches. He reaches around Rodimus' shoulders and presses two fingers against his spoiler, dragging them up and down it's length in soft, gentle strokes. "I'm sorry, I should've kept that one to myself."
"It's why I'm not thinking about it. It's why I can't think about it," Rodimus says, his voice little more than a hush. The metal shivers beneath the touch of Drift's hand in a quiver as gentle as his stroke. "But -- frag, Drift, they'd never stay. Not any more than the Autobots would if Optimus came back after I go and ruin everything."
Good thing none of the Autobots care enough to go looking for Optimus then, Drift wisely doesn't say. "I would stay," he tells Rodimus, wrapping both arms around his shoulders and pulling him in for an embrace. "But you knew that already, right?"
Oh, no. An embrace isn't doing it. Rodimus full-body melds against Drift, slipping his foot over his legs so that he can straddle his hips, and that would probably be way more smooth if his foot was a tenth the size it is. As it is, he definitely catches something on the desk and knocks it over. Whatever. He ignores it. It's not the picture. (For once.) Sliding into Drift's lap, Rodimus presses their hoods close. "I know. And that's why I know you've changed." Or at least changed who he focuses on, right?
As soon as Rodimus starts moving, Drift leans back in his seat to give him more room to manuever. It doesn't help much and Rodimus still manages to knock something off his desk. It's alright, whatever it is isn't as important as what's sitting in his lap right now. He returns to touching and stroking that incredibly pointy spoiler, engine rumbling and sending vibrations through both their bodies. "I'm glad I changed. Maybe it's selfish of me to say but maybe all the bloodshed and grief was worth it if it meant me being here with you right now."
Rodimus grins, just a quick flash, then ruins it by very seriously saying, "It really, really wasn't. But that doesn't mean that I'm not glad you're here now." The pitch of his engine dropping, falling to match the thrum of Drift's, he tilts his head to press their helms together. It's a more companionable press than greedy, despite the way he's bound himself so closely. "And that we can't try to make our future worth all the blood in our past."
Drift looks grim at that. It's true and he knows it, nothing will ever make everything he did worth it. He starts to fall back into that pit of darkness deep within his mind but the touch of Rodimus' head against his brings him out of it before he gets too lost. He wraps himself tight around Rodimus and holds him close, optics dimming as he just savours the moment. "I should apologize to Soundwave," he says quietly.
"Soundwave should apologize to you," Rodimus says more firmly, "but -- maybe you could start. See if he does. And if he doesn't -- tell me. Magnus thinks I'm bending too far to try to accommodate Soundwave and the Decepticons. And I don't know that he's wrong. But at least I can make sure that we're not the only ones apologizing to them."
"And what are you going to do if he doesn't apologize?" Drift asks, optics brightening to he can look at Rodimus. "Are you going to bust in there and demand he do so?" No seriously, that would be funny as hell. "I have.. mixed feelings about letting the Decepticons essentially use us to find Megatron, but I don't know if that counts as bending over backwards for them."
"I'm going to tell him that the Autobots have gone more than halfway to meet him, and ask him why he won't go the rest of the way. If he really believes in this, in this ship, this quest -- I need him to meet you." Rodimus rubs his thumb across Drift's cheek and then sweeps his fingers up the line of his finials. "Do you think I take the Autobots for granted?"
Drift leans into the touch, even turning his head slightly to get as much contact beteen his finials and Rodimus' hand as physically possible. Only when Rodimus asks him that question does he put a stop to it by reaching up and lacing their fingers together. "No." He pulls Rodimus' hand close and turns it over, palm up, and rubs his thumb over the barely legible writing there. "Someone with this doesn't take anything for granted."
Rodimus closes his fingers over Drift's thumb and ducks his head. "Ha. You know -- it might be time." He twists his hand to lace his fingers through Drift's again, pressing his hand palm to palm. "I'm not putting it for a vote this time. Although I know some of them will be more unhappy about this than they ever were about Overlord."
Drift scoffs at that. "Yeah, and I can't get over how ridiculous that is. They can get over the Overlord thing but someone taking off their badge to set a good example is where they draw the line?" His optics widen and he bites his bottom lip when he remembers that, oh yeah, that's exactly what Rodimus and Magnus were dealing with. "..Things will be okay. No matter what happens, I will be at your side.
"I can't blame them for that. Can you, really?" Rodimus covers the badge on Drift's chest with a warm touch. "With everything this badge means to you? I'm just more grateful than I can tell you that even if you never set it aside, you'll still always be here." He tightens the grip of his thighs. So, when he says here, he means under Rodimus, clearly.
"A badge isn't what makes someone an Autobot. A badge is just a symbol," says Drift, the guy who literally carries around a symbol of his dead mentor, and also has himself painted into a symbol of the knights, and also wears an Autobot badge that Magnus specifically gave him. Guy is literally covered in symbols. "Taking off your badge won't change who you are or what you believe in. People need to realize that."
Hands suddenly grip Rodimus' hips and give a tug. "And you're right, I'll still always be here. I hate to break it to you, but you're stuck with me for life."
"It doesn't," Rodimus says, the belief ringing in his voice. His serious -- very very serious -- expression breaks in a wide grin as Drift pulls him closer. Rodimus slides his hand from the badge on Drift's chest to slip his fingertips along the edge of his armor. "I wouldn't have it any other way."