2017-02-22 Packaging Peanuts
From Transformers: Lost and Found
|2017-02-22 Packaging Peanuts|
|Location||Lost Light - Recreation|
|Summary||Drift finds Vortex acting a little sketchy and its his duty to find out why.|
It's been quite some time since Drift had the opportunity to just mill about the ship and hang out as he's been incredibly busy with all matters of important command stuff. Well, command stuff and a dating sim he's been playing (but no one has to know about that.) He walks through the recreation area, giving waves and smiles to anyone he passes.
Vortex has been relieved of medical now that he's free of certain vaccination side effects- and bullet holes. And, seeing how he wasn't shoveled off to the brig, he was left with the notion that he ought to talk to a few folks about his behavior. Especially to Tailgate. Because that's what any good and responsible mech should do.
Anyways, fuck that- he has a little pet project that's been sorely missing his supervision. Vortex sticks as close to the shadows as he can get, scuttling from one place to another and avoiding attention. His rotors fold back and he pauses at a door, checking over his shoulder to make sure he isn't being followed. Or watched.
Try as he might, Vortex is going to be spotted eventually. Thankfully for him, he's spotted by Drift and not one of the many, many people that has beef with Vortex. Common sense and personal experience is telling Drift to just keep walking and not to get involved with whatever Vortex is (surely) schemeing, but his curiousity gets the better of him and he approaches. "Hey, Vortex. Everything alright? You're looking sketchier than usual."
Vortex is satisfie with his over the shoulder look, rotors springing up as he dials in the code to the room. And nearly jumps where he stands. Should have checked over both shoulders. He plays it cool, shifting to lean against the wall. Pssssh-aw! Didn't startle him!
"DRIFT! My favorite cross-faction mech! Also the only one I know that isn't dead so that might have something to do with it." Vortex cants his helm to the side oh so innocently- who could have beef with a face like this. "Sketchy? Moi? You're not Combaticon profiling are you?" He starts to slide over to cover the door's keypad. Nothing here, this door doesn't even open.
"Profiling? No, of course not!" Drift looks slightly offended. "You being sketchy has nothing to do with you being a Combaticon and everything to do with you being, well.. you." He then grins and moves closer, trying to peek around Vortex and see what he's attempting to hide. "But seriously, what are you doing?"
"Hey!" Vortex huffs a little pout. "I'd try and argue that but you're probably right. I do get up to a lot of illeg- sketchy things." So much sketch. His optics narrow beneath his visor. "... It's nunya," he says carefully after a moment.
"Oh, is that so?" Drift's grin starts looking a little smug now as he leans against the doorframe. "You've already gotten yourself in some pretty hot water following certain.. recent events." Drift is sure he read something about Vortex biting Tailgate?? The hell is that all about? "Are you sure you want to add to that by not telling a commander officer what potentially illegal and or dangerous thing you're about to get yourself involved in?"
Vortex hisses under his breath. "That wasn't my fault..." he grumbles. His rotors flick unsurely and he looks around. Ugh, guess he'll have to. "It's not illegal or dangerous but fine, if you want to know what it is. Fine! Fine, fine, fine." He turns and presses the last number on the keypad. With a lil beep, the door slides open, showing a dark room that only some of the hallway light spills into. The rotary gestures Drift forward before crossing him arms.
Drift frowns when Vortex insists it wasn't his faukt. That hits him a bit harder than he expected, considering his own history when it comes to violence on the ship. "What happened exactly anyway?" he asks as he steps into the suspiciously dark room. "In your words, I mean."
Vortex waits for Drift to pass and enter the room to let his rotors to perk up. Hehe, too easy. He makes sure to keep his voice huffy as he creeps closer to the mech. "I was under the emotional influence of both a drug and a previously untested psychological weapon. That's really all there is to it." He lowers himself, preparing... "I mean, I'm not crazy enough to attack a superior officer for no good reason," he says right before ramming into the Third-of-Command with a cackle.
"Hn, well, if that's the case then can you really be held responsible for your actions?" Drift gives Vortex a slight shrug. "Seems like a question Magnus is better suited to answer, he's more versed in subjects like law and order." He quirks an optic ridge at Vortex's last words before he's suddenly rammed into.
"Seriously!?" Even in mid-fall, he puts his hand on the hilt of his sword, ready to draw it as soon as he hits the ground, but it's not ground he hits. It's... soft. It's.. "Are these packing peanuts?" he asks, grabbing a handful of them and squishing them in his fist.
Vortex shuts the door and turns the room's lights on. Now with all the room visible, it can be seen that only part of the room has a floor which makes a fine ledge. The rest has been carved out and filled with, yes, packaging peanutes. Bright pink packaging peanuts. He walks over to the ledge, peering down at Drift. His grin is obvious even with the mask. "Yeah! Cool, innit? I requested this room and the room below it and the peanuts from Logistics. And they handed it all over. So in you LEGAL FACE- HAH!"
Drift is so damn confused right now and it shows on his face as he stares up at Vortex from the packing peanut pit. "I don't understand.. if this is all there is, why were you looking so sketchy? Why the secrecy?" Maybe he was profiling the Combaticon, purely by accident of course.
Vortex shifts to sit on the ledge, kicking his feet like one would on a lake dock. He makes sure his feet come close but never make contact with Drift. Just wanna see him flinch. "Tch, like I'd keep my sketchy illegal junk in the open... It was going to be a surprise. Something fun to do with no real rhyme or reason when I finished. What's it like?" He stretches out a foot to lightly tip-tap on one of this head finials Drift has.
And flinch Drift does, every time that foot gets close to his face. "Well, it certainly is a surprise. I don't think I've ever seen anything like this before." He wrinkles his nose in displeasure when Vortex goes tap-tap on his audial fin and moves back a bit. "It's.. interesting. Very soft. And crinkly."
Vortex's rotors flicker excitedly at that. "I know right?! On Earth they have those ball pit things. But 'Packaging Peanut Pit' had a better ring. I like alliteration." He nods to himself, scooting forward to try and tip-tap those finials some more. Its fun. "Those are good things! No one can get hurt in soft and crinkly. Try doing more, I haven't had a chance to test the fun-ness of everything."
It's not so much that his finials are particularly sensitive (though they are) that has him flinching every time Vortex tries to tap at them, it's more because tweaking his finials is a sign of affection between him and his partners and it's VERY weird having Vortex of all people doing the same thing. He frowns again and scoots further back. "Doing more? Uh.. okay. I guess I can do that."
Drift wades through the peanuts to get to the edge of the pit, opposite of where Vortex is sitting, so he can climb out. He takes a few steps back to get a running start before leaping back into the pit, making sure to do a flip as he goes.
Drift should probably speak up when something is bothering him because Vortex will otherwise keep doing it. Okay, he might keep doing it just because. He watches the mech do his little flip and applauses enthusiastic. "Hah! That looked AWESOME! Did it feel awesome too? How would you rate landing into a pit of packaging peanuts?"
"Definitely a seven out of ten. I would rank it a bit higher if it was bigger but there's only so much you can do about that," Drift says. Then he disappears under the packing peanuts, leaving only the tips of his finials above the surface like some kind of wanna-be shark. He gets closer and closer to Vortex before suddenly springing out of the peanuts to grasp his leg and pull him in.
Vortex' rotors sink at the number. "Only seven? Hnnn... Maybe I can take out some of the walls and make it a two room spread..." He leans back, thinking it over and vaguely paying attention to Drift. That would make it bigger but damaging that many rooms might be more than he's- wait, what is Drift- "ACK! No!" Vortex yelps, claws digging into the ledge as he's pulled in. "Nooooo- oh, hey, this is actually pretty neat."
"Right?" Drift flashes Vortex a toothy grin before climbing back out of the pit. "Alright, move back, I'm going to pull a sweet backflip!" He turns around and places himself right on the edge of the pit before doing exactly what he said he'd do: pull a sweet backflip. He lands into the pit with a commotion, sending peanuts flying all over the place upon contact. "Hahaha! Did you see that? That's gotta be worth AT LEAST five points!"
Vortex shifts and nestle in the packaging peanuts deeper. His rotors give a twirl, sending a few peanuts flying. "A seven? This is at least an eight!" He leans back and 'backstrokes' out of the way. "Eeeeeehehe- it tickles my rotors." With a little kick, he sticks his head up further. "Its not a competition! And if it was, I'd murder you at it. Watch." His engine revs as his rotors spin. Drift's meager peanut propulsion flip is nothing to the peanut hailstorm Vortex's rotors kick up. "HAHA. This is worth AT LEAST fifteen! In your faccccce!"
In his face. Literally. Packing peanuts are flying all over the place, one of them even getting in his mouth and making him gag. "That's not fair, I don't have rotors like you do!" He grabs a handful of peanuts and throws them at Vortex, only for them to flitter harmlessly back into the pile. "This was a pretty good idea, Vortex."
Vortex slows his rotors to a stop, just waggling them over his head instead. Engine quieting to a putter, he sinks down so just his visor is peeping out. "Hehe, don't be jealous of rotots, now," he teases, grinning. "Thank you. Everyone keeps gettin' hurt on this ship and I've gotten hints that not everyone enjoys that. Thought this might be nice. And not painful. Oh, but you will be pulling peanuts outta unspeakable places for days. Maybe weeks."
Going out of his way to make a giant packing peanut pit for people to enjoy because he feels bad about people getting hurt? "Wow, Vortex.." Drift smiles at the Combaticon, a warm but incredibly goofy smile. "That's actually.. really nice of you."
Then he gets to the part about picking peanuts out of places. "...Wait, what??" Drift climbs out of the pit to check something and... yeup, all the peanuts are clinging to his frame thanks to his electric current. He didn't notice this before as he was having too much fun jumping around like an idiot. "Oh gosh, I look ridiculous."
Vortex just shrugs, making his way to that ledge. "Tch, it's nothing. I just get really bored and since I can't fill that boredem with killing Autobots anymore, I'm trying to do something else. You know how it feels. Plus, I'm basically a psychologist, I know what the people want." And they want this pit.
Vortex giggles, holding onto the ledge. "You look super ridiciulous." He takes a peanut and tosses it towards the Autobot's feet, watching as it sticks to the metal. His own peanut-coated rotors judder amusement. "You look like some woolly, pink thing."
Drift gives Vortex the most disapproving frown he can possibly muster. "No, actually, I don't know how that feels." Ignore the fact he has hundreds of hobbies to make sure he is constantly occupied with something.
His expression relaxes when the subject goes back to the peanuts and how silly they are. Look at 'em! Just clinging to him like he was a magnet! "Eh, I think I make it look good."
Vortex cants his helm, not looking convinced. "Mmhmm. I'm sure." But the feeling of the package peanuts are nice on his rotors and rustling against him. Yep, don't wanna ruin this. He'll call Drift Deadlock some other time.
"Pft, if you make it look good, then-" Vortex pulls himself out to pose proudly in front of Drift, hands on his hips and rotors splayed. He's absolutely covered, like a ridiculous sheep. "-I make it look better!"
Drift's optics widen when Vortex pulls himself out of the pit and poses. He brings a hand to his mouth, barely hiding the huge smile behind it. "Oh.. my.. god.. You look.." Ridiculous? Yes, that's been established, but it's more than that. "...Adorable. Seriously, like a big, pink, robot sheep."
Vortex's visor shutters in surprise, rotors sweeping up. He pauses. "I- er- what? I... I am not adorable!" His vents all puff, some peanuts blowing away... And then coming back to cling to him.
Drift busts out laughing as the peanuts fall away only to go right back to clinging onto Vortex's frame. "Yes you are! You totally are! If you could see what I'm seeing, you'd agree." A thought then comes to Drift and he draws his Great Sword, shined to a perfect sheen as it always is. He angles it in a way to catch Vortex's reflection on the flat of the blade so the rotary can see for himself. "See? You're cute, Vortex. Get over it."
Vortex was not going for 'adorable'! He knows when he's trying to play the 'I'm just a tiny lil copter and adorable little brother' card. And he's not doing it right now so clearly- he blinks as a sword is brought out. Wait, not 'a sword'. THE sword. The GREAT sword.
Vortex reaches out to touch it and get his claws all over it. It calls to him... But he stops when he sees himself. "... Holy shit, I am adorable... How adorable? Tailgate levels you think?" I needs to know how much he can milk this.
Drift should've known that the second he pulled out the sword Vortex was going to put his grubby little fingers all over it. Seeing those claw tips touching the blade makes him nervous and his grip tightens around the hilt in case he needs to yank it away should Vortex get a bit too enthusastic with it. He grins when Vortex reaches the same conclusion he did regarding his current look. "Mmm, I don't know about that. Tailgate is hard to beat in the cute department, he's like.. King Cutie or something."
Vortex nods. "Too true, too true. So cute you just wanna pop his head off and rip out his wheels... But how cute am I like this? Scale of one to ten?" He glances up at Drift before going in for the good stuff- like slicing a finger open on that blade. He has to do it.
"Pop his head off and rip out his wheels," Drift repeats flatly. He feels kind of bad for Vortex, the dude is pretty messed up. He then studies the rotary for a long time, musing. "Hmm... I would say an eight out of ten. Maybe nine when you puff out and wiggle your rotors."
Drift catches Vortex's glance just in time to see him go for the sword again. He holds steady, letting the Combaticon get a closer look as he understands how totally awesome great swords are. "Careful, I just had it sharpened."
"Well, yeah? I mean, evertime I see Swin's optics I just wanna rip 'em out or punch a wall! You know how it is." Because this is the former Deadlock he's talking to. Honestly, Vortex wouldn't do anything like that, he just doesn't know how to handle completely and utterly adorable without some vague threat. It's normal! "Hmmm... That's cute enough to get things I want..." He should talk to Tailgate looking like this.
Vortex's rotors flick as the sword is held there. Excellent. He wastes no time in slitting a finger. "I know, that's the point. It is magnificent."
"Vortex!" Drift sounds more exasperated than angry. He quickly yanks the blade away and sheathes it where Vortex can't go chopping any more of his fingers with it. "I should've known better but I was blinded by your adorability," he grumbles, taking Vortex's hand in his so he can see how bad the damage is.
Vortex hums when he hears that. Blinded by his adorability? Hot damn, he's going to milk this for all its worth! Bet he could get some sort of ribbon to tie to himself. Gonna own this. I mean, there's already tuffing up gaps and seams and intakes. Might as well get a bonus from it.
"Pft, its not that bad." No, wait. Its spurting. "Oooo- that thing must have been wicked sharp. That felt great. You can hack off my limbs any day, Drift." Vortex shoots him a smile from under his mask. A happy lil' pink sheep.
It's spurting a lot, so much so that a streak of energon hits Drift right in the face. "Oh geez!" he exclaims, putting pressure on the wound in an attempt to stem the flow. "You may need to see a medic for this if it doesn't stop soon." As for Vortex's comment, Drift scoffs. "I'm not in the habit of hacking off limbs anymore."
Vortex shutters his visor in a wink. "Riiiight, I get you. I'm out of the assassination for higher thing too." Wink-wink. He puffs his vents, the peanuts floofing out before clinging again. "I just got outta the medibay, I ain't going back. It'll stop. Maybe... You're making a mess trying to stop it. Its getting all over you."
Thankfully being coated in someone's energon isn't a trigger for Drift because he's getting a whole lot of it on him right now. "Good god, Vortex, how much energon do you have in you?" His grip tightens and he applies even more pressure now though it doesn't seem to be doing much good. "Look, I can't have you bleeding out in here. You need to see a medic, or find some way to stop the bleeding. You have any tools on you?"
"I mean... An average amount? If we stand here long enough, we'll find out just how much. Now I'm kinda curious..." Vortex trails off, thinking. "We should probably leave so I can bleed out somewhere else then. Because I'm not seeing a medic." And he's not good at fixing a servo with his other servo. "I can just pinch my finger shut with my teeth or something."
"No, we're not going anywhere so you can bleed out. The goal is for you NOT to bleed out!" Drift is starting to freak out a bit now. He already has a history of slicing up (or trying to slice up) some of the crew, he doesn't want to add Vortex to his list of mistakes even though it was a complete and total accident. "Y-yeah, do the teeth thing then." Another spurt of energon hits him in the mouth and he coughs. "Oh gross, it got in my mouth!"
Vortex snickers. "You're pretty funny, Drift. We ought to hang out more, do sword stuff, talk about the endless struggle of the past- it'd be fun!" Vortex nods and gives his hand a tug. Give that back now. "Oh, just swallow. It's energon, ya sparkling." His facemask pulls back to reveal his teeth among all the pink peanuts. Then he just sticks his bleeding finger in. There's the sound of crinkling as he works his jaw and teeth. Some energon dribbles now his his chin. Finally he withdraws, his finger pinched off lower down and barely dribbling. He swallows. "Don't freak out so much. I was only bleeding."
Drift swallowing Vortex's energon seems like a bad move considering Drift has no idea what sorts of things Vortex puts into his systems. For all he knows, Vortex could be using Syk sometimes and the last thing he wants is to get an accidental taste of it. He can't go down that rabbithole again.
"Bleh.." Drift wipes his mouth clean with the back of his hand, watching as Vortex's finger disappears into the mess of teeth hiding behind the pink peanuts. "I'm not freaking out! I'm totally calm and collected right now!"
Vortex's energon is totally clean! He doesn't like things disrupting his ability to think or percieve. He gives Drift a look. "Uh-huh... And that's why you're not shouting. It's okay, you're just out of practice." He reaches out to pat-pat former Deadlock. "Anyways, it stopped bleeding." ... "As much. Success!"
"I'm not shouting!" Drift shouts. His bites his bottom lip and mumbles. "I just.. don't want you to be seriously hurt because of me. If you cut a main line on my sword and bled out.." Onslaught would murder his ass, as well as a few others on the ship for sure. "Yeah, yeah.. success. Just be careful, alright?"
Vortex's rotors flutter and he tilts his head. "Drift, it wouldn't be your fault if I did bleed out. It's not your fault I cut myself. I did that on purpose. Besides, if I wanted to kill myself, I'd know how to do it before you had time to panic." He punches Drift's shoulder, transferring one peanut in return for getting two from Drift. "Hey! I ain't dead yet! I'm always careful." He grins as his mask snaps back into place, catching a peanut between the edges.
Drift finds very little comfort in Vortex's words but he forces a smile anyway. He can't help but wonder though, what happened to Vortex that made him like this? Would he be like that too, hurting himself intentionally and knowing just how to kill himself in any given situation, if he hadn't had his fateful encounter on Theopany? Heavy shit right there.
"Heh, keep going on like this and that wont last much longer," Drift says, reaching over to pull the peanut caught between the edge of his facemask. "You said you wanted to do sword stuff sometime?"
Vortex goes cross-eyed, watching Drift take the peanut. He makes a small sneeze- that tickled! "Oh, yeah! It's hard for me to find mechs who can challenge me with a blade. I'd like to see what you got."
Drift laughs at Vortex's sneeze. "Nine out of ten," is all he says about that. He flicks the peanut away only for it to fall and stick to his wrist but he ignores it for now. "Likewise. Few on the ship can match me when it comes to the blade, but you may surprise me."
Vortex notes that down. Small sneezes get him more cute points. Excellent. "I'd love to take you up on that challenge. We can even bet to make it more interesting. I love a good bet. Alright, you talked me into it! You're on."
"Oh, I don't know about betting. I don't want to rob you blind," Drift teases. He plucks a few peanuts from the mass stuck to Vortex and arranges them on the rotary's helm in little makeshift horns. "Send me a message sometime and we can make plans to hit the practice rooms. You can also drop by my office, but I can't guarantee I'll be able to just drop everything and have a go at you."
Vortex puffs out his chassis. "If you think you'll be the one robbin' someone, you don't know what us Combaticons are made of." He looks up as Drift does... Something. What's he doing? "Stop by sometime and you'll drop everything so we can fite. Got it." Hehe. "... what'd you just do to my head?"
"That's.. that's not at all what I said," Drift says, knowing full well it's falling on deaf ears. Ah well. "I'd show you but I'm worried you'll cut open another finger. You're just going to have to find a mirror yourself."
"Hmph..." Guess he will! Though he'll probably forget to check and elect to, instead, see what he can get out of being adorable. "Well, thanks for testin' this out... Can I get your word I won't get in trouble for cutting out the floor?"
"I'm going to have a technician come in here and check everything, make sure your project didnt threaten the structural integrety of anything," Drift notes. "But yes, you have my word that you wont get in trouble for this. I promise."
Fist pump of victory! "Sweet! It should be safe but smart idea. Oh, here." Vortex pings Drigt a code. "You can come in whenever you want. Bring the Captain or Magnus- maybe that lil guy he sometimes is- until it's all safe and good to open for everyone who wants to try it. Just don't let them melt the peanuts." At the mention of that, the rotary gets a thoughtful look as he crosses over to the exit. He shuts off the lights and and opens the door, the light spilling in casting a shadow across Drift. With horns and everything thank to the Autobot. "Ya know, the peanut that get into our joints and under armor might start to melt into our systems. I forget if I got the flame-retardant stuff or not."
Drift knows Rodimus will get a kick out of this room, but Magnus will definitely have to be talked into it. Regardless, he expects a whole lot of fun out of this. "I'll keep your peanuts safe, don't worry," he laughs. The laughter fades when Vortex drops that bomb.
"Vortex... are you serious!?" The peanuts are suddenly less ridiculous and more dangerous. He rushes out the door, already planning to seek out Perceptor and get these packing peanuts tested. "We'll talk later!" he shouts over his shoulder.
"Hey, you might be worried for nothing!" Vortex calls after Drift. "And they'd only cause moderate damage based on what systems they melt into! Try to stay calm- getting worked up will only make them melt faster!" Beat. "If I got the melty kind!" And that's a big IF. "Okay, okay! Talk you you later, pal!" Hehe, Drift looks funny storming off covered in those peanuts. Hah. This was a great idea.