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2016-11-20 How to Kill Two Bots With One Bird

From Transformers: Lost and Found

How to Kill Two Bots With One Bird
Date 2016/11/20
Location Red Alert and Waspinator's Habsuite
Participants Red Alert, Waspinator
NPCs Marceline
Summary Waspinator's pet gets loose, and once again Red and Wasp's booby-trapped habsuite proves to be far more dangerous for them than any would-be intruders.

While the habsuites are all shared, one can be reassured that each contains a workstation, a nice big monitor screen, space for bots in their alt modes, and recharge slabs for both individuals. They might have to fight over who gets the slab by the window, however.


Waspinator is standing in front of Marceline the space bird's box, carefully lifting the lid to drop a small tin of paint inside. He knows Red Alert doesn't like its cage to be open but by now the bug knows the creature isn't going anywhere. That doesn't stop him from sending anxious glances towards his roommate. Wazzpinator doezzn't want to upzzet Redbot... Redbot hazz zzeemed... mad. Probably more anxious and worried due to the kidnapping incident a while back but Waspinator doesn't quite know how to identify that in others. As he places down the dish, the space bird in question flutters up to sit on Waspinator's hand contently. Welp now the bug is trapped until it notices the paint tin. "..izz... izz Redbot ok?"

Things have been quiet lately. Perhaps not well, but at least quiet. Red has been spending a lot of time in the habsuite these days, his shifts few and far between as he winds down from his latest panic attack and horror adventures. The time off has given him time to process everything that's happened and gradually come to terms with it, and it's looking like things will be okay.

Until they aren't.

He's lying at the edge of the berth, half dozing while Waspinator bustles about his business. One of the things he's had to come to terms with is sharing a room, but they've managed in their own way. Red's drifting in and out of sleep in his presence--a surprising show of trust--and things would be alright if his processor didn't betray him as it always did.

One moment he's awake, watching Waspinator feed his pet, and the next he's in that off-kilter state between sleep and waking, where things aren't quite real anymore. And it's no longer Waspinator in his room. It's Kickback.

He shouts, jerking awake suddenly, and the movement takes him right off the bed and onto the boobytrapped floor. He hits it with a loud clangggg that resonates throughout the room, and he curls quickly as his feet almost brush one of the locations where a trap is hidden. It's a near-miss, but the damage is done, as the peace in the room is thoroughly shattered. Things can only go well from here.

Waspinator jumps badly, yelping, when instead of an answer the response he gets is a near deafening crash. Immediately leaping back, Waspinator gets into a more defensive stance... only to send Marceline the space bird flying as he suddenly jerks his arm."AH NO MARCELINE IZZ OK!!"

With a loud chittering shriek of protest and fear, the bird is quickly zipping around the room in a panic of its own. It goes smacking into shelves, the wall, even managing to whack Waspinator in the face when he makes a mad dive to grab it. "COME BACK! IZZ OK!" Waspinator shrieks in his own right.

Everything's suddenly very loud, and in his just-waking panic Red Alert doesn't know how to respond. He makes an aborted grab for his gun, but the Kickback from his dreams has vanished, and now it's just his shrieking roommate and the bird... The bird! It's loose! Red grabs onto the edge of his berth and drags himself upright. Though his limbs still feel heavy with the remnants of sleep, his panicked state is quickly shaking that off.

"What's happening?" he demands, still not quite aware that he's the source of all this chaos.

<FS3> Waspinator rolls Fate's Chewtoy: Good Success. (4 7 4 8 3 8 2 3 4 5 6)

Waspinator makes another lunge for his pet, trying to grab it as the bird flies into a shelf on his side of the room. Again the bug misses only this time the alien's flailing shoves a pretty metal ball he found from the shelf, landing directly on Waspinator's head. Reeling back in pain as he clutches his helm, the decepticon looks up at Red Alert from his spot on the floor. "Wazz loud clank! Wazzpinator jump and zzcare Marceline, have to catch it!"

Just as Waspinator explains, the metal ball rolls across the floor, triggering one of the traps. there is a large burst of electricity that nearly fries one of Waspinator's wings. "AH! TRAPZZ GOING OFF!!"

At the crackle of electricity Red leaps onto his berth and away from the traps firing. He watches the chaos unfold from his vantage point: the creature rocketing around the room, Waspinator being foiled at every turn, the screaming, the traps unleashing. A sense of guilt settles in his stomach as it all begins to piece together.

"Uhh...I think that was me. I must have had a nightmare and rolled off the berth. Sorry." Now that he's waking up a bit he can at least start to formulate a plan, and as he watches the creature dart around there is only one conclusion he can come to. "We have to catch it before it causes any more damage." Because their room may in fact be the worst place on the entire ship to have a loose creature running around in.

<FS3> Waspinator rolls Reaction+Reaction: Success. (6 2 4 1 6 6 6 7)

While Red Alert may be regarding the situation rather calmly, Waspinator is likely only adding to the chaos. His approach is also to catch the bird, only he has taken to chasing it around the room limbs and wings only working the bird into a larger panic at the deafening buzz coming off the wasp. "WAZZPINATOR IZZ TRYING!" The bird knocks several more items off the shelves and Waspinator turns from trying to grab the thing to catching the objects falling off. He barely manages to snag the objects, catching the last with just the tips of his clawed hands... then they are haphazardly tossed onto his berth where they will be safe from the bird.

<FS3> Red_Alert rolls Reaction + Reaction: Success. (8 6 5 2 6 6 5 5)

"I can do this," Red Alert says, more to himself than to Waspinator. He tiptoes across the room, avoiding the chaos, and snatches up a waste basket. It's the closest thing to a net that he can find, and it will have to do for now. Everything inside of it is carefully piled in the corner where it can do no harm, and he waits. He feels like a predator--like Ravage--quietly poised with basket raised, just waiting for his prey to slip up and draw closer. Just have to wait for the right moment--now! He swoops into action as the bird flies near, a blur of motion, the waste basket cutting an elegant arc through the air, and...

He totally misses, and the force of his sudden motion knocks him off balance.

"Whoa!" He tumbles to the ground, but in a moment of quick reflexes he manages to catch himself on his free hand, looking like he's playing a game of Twister as his face hovers just centimeters over one of the boobytrapped tiles.

That was too close.

<FS3> Waspinator rolls Transportation: Good Success. (2 5 7 8 1 1 5 3 4 5)

Waspinator yelps as yet another missed lunge causes him to hit his head against the wall. Waspinator is really doing more harm (to himself) than good here. Twisting around, he goes to- AHHH! Redbot going to die with... Oh. No, Redbot caught himzzelf. Good. Wazz good try! Without really thinking about it he goes to help the mech up.

Wait, Wazzpinator can't pull him back or arm might zzlip and... Wazzpinator knowzz what to do! The buzzing increases drastically as Waspinator takes off, hovering just above the trapped floor. Careful to avoid hitting anything, the bug grips his roommate's back paneling- likely pinching wires with his claws unintentionally- and yanks the mech back to his feet on the safe side.

Red Alert tenses up as claws dig into his back. I'm helpless. I should have known. I can't trust Waspinator after all--

Except he's pulled back on his feet, deposited safely on a patch of bare floor. He turns slowly to face Waspinator, not sure what to say. Thank you? I'm sorry I ever doubted you? I'm really glad you're my roommate? He's quiet for a moment, not sure what to say first, but then the moment is ruined as the space bird whizzes between their faces.

"You!"

And the chase is back on.

<FS3> Waspinator rolls Reaction+Reaction: Success. (4 4 5 3 4 2 2 7)

<FS3> Red_Alert rolls Reaction + Reaction: Success. (3 5 5 5 3 8 6 3)

The chase is indeed back on, Waspinator refocusing on the bird with a near predatory narrowing of his optics. Wazzpinator will catch it!! It would probably work better if he didn't go right back to his prior strategy of 'chase and grab at'.

The bird continues to avoid capture, only now it is struggling along Red Alert's side of the room. After bouncing off the berth a few times it flops, still flailing, onto his bedside table... where the music box is. All it takes is one sweep of a wing and down the object goes.

Waspinator lets out a horrified gasp as he watches the music box fall, clutching at his head in a panic. Waspinator knows how much Red Alert treasures that thing, even he has begun to like it as the other plays the calming music so much in the room. The bug rushes forward to catch it, sliding across the floor on his front so he manages to get his hands underneath it just in time before it hits the ground.

Red Alert moves almost within that same second, but instead he makes a flying leap, catapulting right over the danger of the floor tiles--with various traps springing right after Waspinator passes over them--and sailing through the air with hand outstretched. Like a dream the music box lands safely in his palm, and the back of his hand lands in Waspinator's. It would almost be perfect if the rest of Red Alert didn't immediately follow, crunching down on Waspinator with all of his weight.

Ouch.

Waspinator lets out a sigh of relief as the music box is safe- only to let out a pained OOF as the air is driven out of him by his roommate's weight. Ow. What also hurts is the fire trap he flew over searing the tips of his wings, but that is currently ignored... he may not even have noticed. "Izz box ok?" The bird suddenly seems to settle, almost as if it is satisfied with the amount of chaos caused and tired now. It flops off the table and lands with a splat on the bug's head, where it happily starts gnawing away at the paint of his face. Well. Looks like its caught.

Red Alert reaches out with a shaking hand and carefully lifts the lid off the box. Instantly the room is filled with a peaceful melody, such a stark contrast to the chaos of a moment ago. Red settles against Waspinator in relief, resting his chin against the bug's shoulder.

"It is. Thank goodness." He's quiet for a moment, soaking in the melody and letting peace descend upon them once more, and then slowly his optics travel down to where he's currently lying. "Oh, sorry," he mumbles, and he rolls off Waspinator, bringing the music box up to his chest and cradling it there. "I think we tired it out," he says, eying the bird now flopped over Waspinator's head (where so many other things have landed today). He thinks a moment, and then adds, "I think it tired me out too." He doesn't really want to move anymore, and so he carefully stretches over the floor where most of the traps have already been fired, nets hanging from the ceiling or electric and fire traps having burnt themselves out.

"Let's...not do that again." No more dozing off while Waspinator feeds his pet, in other words.

Waspinator goes crosseyed as Marceline drifts down in its trailing, now right between the bug's optics. "Wazzpinator izz tired." he simply agrees. The bug lets himself go limp as well, listening to the music as one hand raises to pet the little creature on his face. It lets out a happy trill, more than used to being petted by now, and almost seems to lean into it (a very stark contrast to its avoidance and shrieking earlier). "Yezz. Zzhould not do again." Gently tugging the bird off his face, Waspinator lets it crawl/scrape its way across his hand, laying the limb on the floor in front of him.

Red Alert watches the trilling and the petting going on with a tilt of his head. It's almost...cute? Slowly he reaches out as if to touch it, but then the music box reaches its looping point and the song starts over again, and he remembers what almost just happened. He's not going to reward the thing for bad behaviour.

"Come on, we should put it back before it causes any more damage." He slowly pushes himself up, then offers a hand to Waspinator. "Let's put it back where it will be safe." Where we will be safe, he mentally adds, because right now it's faring a lot better than either of them are.

Waspinator's wingtips are still smoking slightly.

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